Please help me
I am ill. Flu can officially kiss my ass. It is instead, currently kicking my ass from here to… well the other end of my bed because that’s about as far as I can move before the aching & shivering is too unbearable.
However, after a day in bed I am already at my wits end. Not only because I feel like crap and am bored out of my tree, but also, and this is where I really need your help, it has turned me into a complete girl.
This will come as a shock to precisely no people at all, but I’m not really the girliest of girls. I don’t watch soaps, I don’t coo over babies, I don’t have an innate love of the colour pink and I really hate Pretty Woman – I mean please, when have you ever seen a hooker look that good and a) she’s not been a ladyboy or b) you’re off your tits on drugs? I mean, come on people!
But alas, this horrid coldy flu thing has meant that today I have both cried because I wanted my mum and found solace in the funny cat videos on YouTube.
It’s a sorry state of affairs, I tell you. I’m not even a cat person. I’m very much in the dog camp when it comes to canines versus felines. A dog will get my vote every single time.
But oh, just look at the adorableness of these two cats chatting to each other…
Aren’t they cute? I want to snuggle in there with them and let them chat away to each other while I listen on contentedly… except for the end bit when they get all kitteh-on-kitteh with each other. That shit’s just awkward for the casual bystander.
I know, I’m as shocked & appalled as you are. I’m deeply ashamed of myself. I’ve gone from an emotionally stable, rational woman to “the crazy cat woman” in about 23 hours.
I don’t want to be this girl. I don’t want to own a brown sofa. And I don’t want to turn into a Michael Bublé/Robbie Williams/Generic Bland Pop Star fan either. Oh god no. Anything but that.
Please, please help me…
Dena i think you need to go to the hospital!!!!! I am techincally the aforementioned ‘crazy cat women’ in that i have 2 cats……(I also have a beige sofa, what are you insinuating mrs??)
However even i didnt think that was ‘that’ cute, mainly because ([;’ppppppppppppppppp – Eric actually typed that…) thats the noise mine make when trying to wake me up in the morning……shut up cats!!!
If you find it cute then something is SERIOUSLY wrong, someone needs to conduct some tests!
Hope you feel better soon lovely xxx
LOL. You see, I know that this cat video is more than a bit shit, but I was in such a medicated, fluey mess yesterday that I thought it was adorable.
You know me better than most people and you know that there are VERY few things on the planet that I find adorable. When not viewed through a pharmaceutically induced haze that is.
Normal, cynical, sarcastic, bitchy service will be resumed soon. I promise
Dena, don’t be that girl, we support you!
By the way, get well soon!
All better now & no more watching of cat videos. Phew.
Thanks Facundo